Happy Halloween!

I am so mad at you, Mom. I just might poop on your cell phone like Eli did.

How many?

It all started innocently enough. It'll be nice to have a couple friends over to watch Wallace and Gromit movies. And make pizza for them.

So, S invited herself and A over for an afternoon of W&G and pizza.

Then S invited R and it snowballed, with me inviting J and K as well. At that point, I increased the menu to include stuffed mushrooms.

Last night, S asked if her boyfriend and D, another coworker, could come too.

Sooo... if everyone comes, it's going to be 9 people in total (don't forget Josh and me!). Since there'll be 3 guys in attendance now, rather than just a small group of girls, pizzas and mushrooms probably won't cut it, so here's the new menu:

White Bean Dip with Baked Pita Chips
Stuffed Mushrooms
Pissaladiere
Lemon Chicken Skewers with Satay Sauce

S will supply dessert and have other guests bring beverages, because some of this is her fault.

How old are you now?

I did this quiz to figure out what age I act, and it said I was 25. Crazy - I'm 24, so the results weren't very far off.

You Are 25 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Grandma Dora

I started knitting a couple weeks ago. Serious knitting, not like the stuffed animal blankets I used to make when I was a kid. No, I'm not talking about sweaters. I'm not good enough and I don't think I'd pay enough attention to do a good job. I'd probably make a sweater with one sleeve.

I started with a scarf two Sundays ago, and I have completed my creation. It's awesome and not too crooked on the sides.

I was knitting while watching TV last week, wearing my new glasses, and Josh laughed at me, saying that I was officially old.

Burger Creepy

Has anyone seen those Burger King commercials with the a guy wearing a king costume complete with plastic mask?

Usually, you see some guy doing his everyday routine and all of a sudden the Burger King appears out of nowhere. If I were the person being surprised by the Burger King, I'd freak out. Wouldn't you freak out if you were pulling up your window blinds and saw the Burger King on the other side of the glass, close enough to fog up your view (if he can breathe through that plastic mask)? Don't even get me started on the guy working on the construction of a high rise building scenario.

Creepy guy with plastic face offering you a meat-normous sandwich with meat, on top of meat, ON TOP OF MEAT!

Scares me enough to make me want to be a vegetarian... almost.

Ah, the spectacle

I went to my first eye doctor appointment ever this Monday. I figured that all that squinting I've been doing can't be blamed on lack of sleep (entirely).

Surprise, surprise, I'm nearsighted. Thanks law school! I hope I didn't pick out frames that were too nerdy or too anything. At least I don't have to wear the glasses all the time - I only need them when I'm watching TV, at the movies, or driving.

Since I can't afford to go to the movies and no longer drive, I guess these are my TV specs.

Mmm... television: Teacher, mother, secret lover.

Non-customer service

I recently got a new Cingular phone, switching from Verizon Wireless. Because of the way Amazon did the deal, I couldn't carry my old phone number with me because I wouldn't have gotten my new phone for free. So far, there haven't been any problems with Cingular, but I've been getting weird phone calls, probably having to do with the previous holder of my phone number. Every day, I get a phone call from this 866 area code number. When I call it back, I get some kind of Sprint customer service department.

Last night, I decided to have a conversation with somebody at this number and figure why they keep calling me and not leaving a voicemail.

SPRINT REP #1
You're getting the calls because a Sprint customer put your number down for a reference number. Can you tell me the account number of that Sprint customer?

ME
I have no idea who had this phone number before me. Cingular issued the phone number to me when I opened a new account with them last week.

SPRINT REP #1
I see. Well, we can't do anything about the phone calls you get from us unless we have that account number. The next time you get a call from our number, just pick up the phone and ask the rep what account number they're calling in reference to.

ME
But that's someone from your department! You could just look up my phone number and take it out of your computer system!

SPRINT REP #1
We don't have that ability here. You should call the regular Sprint customer service department. We're the finance department. They have a different system than we do and they'll be able to tell you the account number.

So, I called the other customer service number, only to be asked for my Sprint phone number by the computer system. I didn't have one, so I tried dialing zero, which didn't work.

SPRINT REP #2
Hi, this is [Sprint REp #2], what's your Sprint account number?

ME
I don't have a Sprint account number. [Repeat story about daily phone calls]

SPRINT REP #2
You should just answer the phone and speak to the rep who calls you.

ME
How can I do that? I've had my phone out at work, and when I answer it, there's nobody at the other end! I find it slightly creepy to keep on getting these calls where no one's at the other end.

SPRINT REP #2
Well, we use an auto dialer, so there's a pause. That's why you don't hear anything at first.

ME
So you use a telemarketing tool?

SPRINT REP #2
Yes. We make courtesy calls.

ME
Well, I don't want your Sprint courtesy calls. [Sprint Rep #1] told me to call this other customer service number and I'm not allowed to speak with a human unless I have a Sprint phone number. I've never even been a Sprint customer and I certainly will never be after all this! If you use an auto dialer, why don't you just delete my number?

SPRINT REP #2
We'd have to do that manually and that would take too long.

ME
I want to speak to a manager.

Call transfers

SPRINT REP #1
The manager has left for the day. You should call the customer service number tomorrow because they're not in anymore.

ME
Then why did you give me their number to call about this issue?

SPRINT REP #1
I assumed that you were going to call them tomorrow.

ME
I want to resolve this issue today, not tomorrow. Anyways, I can't reach a rep unless I have a Sprint phone number.

SPRINT REP #1
You need to dial *2

ME
What does the Sprint finance department do then?

SPRINT REP #1
We clear accounts that have outstanding balances.

ME
So you're tracking down delinquent Sprint customers who don't pay their bills.

I called the other number again, only to find that you're supposed to dial *2 from your Sprint cell phone, which I again, don't have!

SPRINT REP #3
Hi, can I have your Sprint account number?

ME
Hi, I'd like to speak to [Sprint Rep #1]

SPRINT REP #3
She's on another call right now.

ME
[Repeat story about daily phone calls and conflicting information given by Sprint reps #1 and 2]

SPRINT REP #3
Oh, I heard her talking to you about that. Hold please.

Call transfers

ME
I want an address where I can lodge a complaint. I also want the number of your legal department so I can speak to them about these harassing phone calls.

SPRINT REP #1
I don't know the number of the legal department. There's also another department that could help you but I don't have their new phone number. I can give you the business services number. Maybe they can help you.

ME
Look it up! How can Sprint departments not know how to contact each other or what they do? You can't even tell me how to contact a human being in customer service with instructions that actually work! You keep telling me that I should take the time out of my work day and waste my cell phone minutes trying to fix YOUR mistakes! I am never going to have a Sprint phone and even after this issue is someday resolved, I'm going to write a letter about this!

SPRINT REP #1
Hold please.

Call transfers

SPRINT MANAGER
Hi, this is [Sprint Manager].

By now, I'm seriously pissed about the lies/conflicting information provided by all Sprint reps.

ME
Did [Sprint Rep #1] tell you why I'm calling?

SPRINT MANAGER
Actually, the message was a bit garbled. Tell me again please.

ME
Surprise, surprise that she couldn't even tell her manager the problem clearly.
[Repeat story about daily phone calls and all the crappy information provided by their so-called finance department]

SPRINT MANAGER
I can take care of this for you. I'll just put your number on the do-not-call list.

ME
Thanks.

Insert screaming/ripping-out-hair here.

I'd like some extra law please

Josh and I were at Ferrara's this evening enjoying a cup of the best (although quite expensive) hot chocolate around. While we were enjoying our dessert, the topic of my cousin's imminent marriage proposal came up.

I joked with Josh, saying that if he were to propose marriage, it wouldn't be one of those romantic to-dos like you see in the movies. He'd probably be in the bathroom doing a big number 2, or as he puts it, a number 8. Then he'd call for me and make me yell "WHAT??!" back at him. He'd probably ask for some toilet paper and say that if I bring the toilet paper to him, thus entering the biohazard area of his creation, we would get married.

The sad part of this conversation is not in my disgusting scatalogical humor.

We were discussing the bilateral and unilateral contract implications of such a transaction. See what I said about law school messing you up? You can't even enjoy good ol' toilet bowl humor anymore!

Sudorku

Last week, I participated in my first sudoku drill with three other coworkers. The best part is that nobody could walk by and say that we were slacking off and needed to be managed, because a manager was one of those three coworkers and swearing her head off about her puzzle.

We're such dorks.