Crap

Two weeks ago, some birds took a few huge dumps on my car. The weather forecast predicted thunderstorms for half of the week, so I figured, "Why bother taking the car to the car wash when Mother Nature will do the work for me?"

Of course, the weatherman was wrong and it didn't rain a bit, leaving nothing but dried bird crap all over my car.

Finally, my car was washed on Sunday, thanks to Josh, and on Monday, a bird crapped on it. And then another bird crapped on it today as well.

Figures.

Countdown

Work has taken a plunge for the worse as of last Thursday. I really don't understand how a supervisor could get it into their head that they don't have to explain their decisions. Um... can we say dictator?

"I expect you to fall into my plan and I should not have to explain myself."

Throughout the condescending speech, I stared this woman, who is older than my own mother, straight in the eye with the blankest of stares. I did not nod once to agree with her. I just blinked if she said something mean to me.

Apparently, I am the queen of the blank stare.

Addiction

Josh says that I have a gambling problem. He has this opinion because I bought a scratch-off bingo game a couple weeks ago for $2, winning $5. I hadn't bought one since last summer.

I told him that I planned to use my winnings to buy two more bingo games and get $1 back, making it seem as though I paid $1 to play three games.

He tells me this is how gambling addicts begin. But ho ho, I know when to stop! (When my initial $2 runs out!)

Truly, I must be an addict, considering the fact that I haven't even brought in my winning card for two weeks already.

Love Actually

I finally got my copy of "Love Actually" yesterday! I love this movie, which has been called the "ultimate romantic comedy." Surprisingly, even guys like it too. However, one man I work with saw it and said he didn't understand the nudity. (If you've seen the movie, you know what he's talking about) When he said that, I think I got really smart all of a sudden (think Will Ferrell style in the debate portion of "Old School") and said, "No, it's not so irrelevant. Many people today go through the motions of a relationship to have sex, but those two in the movie went through the motions of sex and came out with a relationship."

I was amazed with myself because I didn't know what I could say to defend my beloved movie to this man's question until I was struck with comprehension as I was about to open my mouth and say, "Shut up Mike, I loved the movie, so bugger off."

White as apple pie

Van Helsing is coming out next week. Call me a dork, but I can't wait to see it! Many of my acquaintances find my taste in movies questionable. Josh doesn't understand why I'm anticipating this movie. He just looks at me with this face when I'm bouncing in my seat watching the commercials, saying that it's directed by the same guy who directed The Mummy. (Nobody understands why I like The Mummy so much that I own the DVD).