It had been disgustingly hot in NY when we left for the cruise, so hearing about the gorgeous weather that arrived just as we left really boiled my potatoes. I was thinking, "I could be home, not getting docked at work for this week, hugging my kitties, and gallavanting in the lovely non-humid niceness rather than trying not to punch any of the Nocheeses."
As we relaxed in Magen's Bay of St. Thomas, I tried to make conversation with Mr. Nocheese.
ME
The weather here is beautiful, but it turns out that NY is down to the 70s this week.
MR. NOCHEESE
No it's not. The weather is predicted to be in the 90s this week.
ME
There was a huge storm last night in NY and it affected the temperature. I saw it on the news last night. It was so severe that in one house, a tree branch was driven through the roof and into the family's living room and almost struck a kid while she was having dinner!
At this time, the rest of the Nocheeses gather around us as I disagree with their oh-so-knowledgeable patriarch, staring at me because how dare I have the nerve to contradict him!
MR. NOCHEESE
No, the weather is predicted to be in the 90s this week.
MY INNER MONOLOGUE
He thinks I'm making this up!
ME
Okay. I'm just telling you what I saw on the news.
WHAT I THINK MR. NOCHEESE WAS THINKING
What a stupid little Asian girl. She's making up stuff and trying to substantiate her words by saying she watched the news. Obviously, she is too dumb to watch the news if she quit law school! I am so smart!
The weather here is beautiful, but it turns out that NY is down to the 70s this week.
MR. NOCHEESE
No it's not. The weather is predicted to be in the 90s this week.
ME
There was a huge storm last night in NY and it affected the temperature. I saw it on the news last night. It was so severe that in one house, a tree branch was driven through the roof and into the family's living room and almost struck a kid while she was having dinner!
At this time, the rest of the Nocheeses gather around us as I disagree with their oh-so-knowledgeable patriarch, staring at me because how dare I have the nerve to contradict him!
MR. NOCHEESE
No, the weather is predicted to be in the 90s this week.
MY INNER MONOLOGUE
He thinks I'm making this up!
ME
Okay. I'm just telling you what I saw on the news.
WHAT I THINK MR. NOCHEESE WAS THINKING
What a stupid little Asian girl. She's making up stuff and trying to substantiate her words by saying she watched the news. Obviously, she is too dumb to watch the news if she quit law school! I am so smart!
Two days later, Mr. Nocheese told me that he had been watching the news and said that I was right about the temperature being in the 70s that week. I wasn't feeling victorious over what he said because he said it as though conferring a great honor upon me. It was more like him saying, "What a good girl! You wanna biscuit? Wanna biscuit! Yes you do! What a smart girl!!"
It turns out that Mr. Nocheese's uncanny ability to predict the weather is not restricted to his shiny pate of a head. His sons have inherited his innate sense of weather! The night before our debarkation, MB and CC wouldn't stop worrying about the supposed storms in the NY area.
COMPUTER COUSIN
There are supposed to be thunder storms that Sunday. We'll probably get home so much later because of them.
JOSH
Well, the storms might pass by the time we land. We're not supposed to get back until 4:00 and your flight is even later than ours.
MAMA'S BOY
No, there are supposed to be huge storms all morning. We're not going to get home on time.
JOSH
Exactly. The storms are in the morning. Our flights don't arrive until after 4:00.
ME
[checking the weather on weather.com]
It says that the rain is only in the morning and will most likely end by the time we even leave Puerto Rico.
COMPUTER COUSIN
Those storms are going to make our flights late. They'll probably be delayed in Puerto Rico.
ME
Whatever.
There are supposed to be thunder storms that Sunday. We'll probably get home so much later because of them.
JOSH
Well, the storms might pass by the time we land. We're not supposed to get back until 4:00 and your flight is even later than ours.
MAMA'S BOY
No, there are supposed to be huge storms all morning. We're not going to get home on time.
JOSH
Exactly. The storms are in the morning. Our flights don't arrive until after 4:00.
ME
[checking the weather on weather.com]
It says that the rain is only in the morning and will most likely end by the time we even leave Puerto Rico.
COMPUTER COUSIN
Those storms are going to make our flights late. They'll probably be delayed in Puerto Rico.
ME
Whatever.
1 comment:
A side note...
you'd be surprised how many people who were 1L with me are not at law school anymore. Realizing "Oh flan, I do NOT want to do this" is a lot more common than I thought it would be.
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